Why your 120,000-word novel isn’t too plotted—it’s over-explained at the sentence level, and how cutting unnecessary detail can save 20,000+ words
The Hidden Bloat Problem
Your beta readers say it: “This feels long.”
You’re confused. You’ve already cut three subplots. Every scene serves the main story. The pacing is tight. Where’s the bloat?
The answer: In places you’d never think to look.
It’s not your plot. It’s your sentences.
When editors analyze manuscripts with excessive word counts, they rarely find unnecessary scenes or wandering subplots. Most writers have already internalized those lessons. Instead, they find something more insidious:
Micro-bloat. Unnecessary words in nearly every sentence. Redundant details in nearly every paragraph. Over-explained defaults that readers would assume anyway.
According to a 2024 editorial analysis, manuscripts averaging 3-5 unnecessary words per sentence accumulate 15,000-25,000 excess words across a standard novel. That’s the difference between a tight 95,000-word manuscript agents love and a bloated 120,000-word manuscript they reject as “needs significant trimming.”
The most common culprit? Over-explaining default objects and gestures.
This comprehensive guide will teach you to identify the defaults readers automatically assume, eliminate unnecessary specificity, and cut thousands of words without losing a single meaningful detail.
Understanding Default Assumptions
What Are Defaults?
Defaults: The standard characteristics readers automatically assume for common objects, actions, and situations unless told otherwise.
Examples of reader defaults:
Object: “car” Readers assume:
- Four wheels with round, black tires
- Doors, windows, steering wheel
- Seats inside
- Standard car shape and function
Action: “pointed” Readers assume:
- Extended finger
- Arm raised/extended
- Gesture directed at something
- Standard pointing motion
Setting: “kitchen” Readers assume:
- Stove, refrigerator, sink
- Counters and cabinets
- Food preparation space
- Standard kitchen elements
The Default Principle
If readers will assume it automatically, you don’t need to state it.
Over-explained (redundant): Nathan drove his car down the street on its four round black rubber tires.
Default assumption version: Nathan drove his car down the street.
What readers automatically assume: Cars have tires. Tires are round and black. This is standard.
What you saved: 8 unnecessary words
When multiplied across novel: Thousands of excess words
Why Writers Over-Explain Defaults
Reason #1: Hyper-visualization
Writers see scenes vividly in their minds. Every detail is clear. They feel compelled to transfer that complete image to page.
The problem: Readers don’t need every detail to visualize. They fill in defaults automatically.
Reason #2: Misunderstanding “show don’t tell”
Writers interpret “show” as “describe everything exhaustively.”
The truth: “Show” means be specific when it matters, not describe every mundane detail.
Reason #3: Fear of vagueness
Writers worry that without extensive detail, scenes will feel generic or unclear.
The truth: Specific details matter. Default details are assumed anyway.
Reason #4: Word count padding
Some writers deliberately inflate description to reach target word count.
The problem: Agents and editors immediately recognize this. It signals amateur craft.
The Five Categories of Over-Explained Defaults
Category #1: Standard Object Characteristics
What it is: Describing the normal, expected features of common objects.
Examples of over-explanation:
Excess detail: Sarah sat in a wooden chair with four legs, a flat seat, and a vertical back support.
Default assumption: Sarah sat in a chair.
Why this works: Readers know what chairs are. Unless this chair is unusual, standard description is assumed.
Excess detail: Marcus drove down the street in his car, which had round black tires, four doors, windows, and a steering wheel.
Default assumption: Marcus drove down the street.
Why this works: All those details are standard car features. Assumed.
Excess detail: She ate her sandwich—two slices of bread with filling between them, cut diagonally.
Default assumption: She ate her sandwich.
Why this works: That’s what sandwiches are. Default structure assumed.
When to describe object details:
Describe when deviating from default:
Sarah sat in a three-legged stool that wobbled precariously. (Three legs = unusual, affects action)
Marcus’s car had neon pink square tires. (Drastically non-standard, worth noting)
Her sandwich had been cut into precise one-inch cubes. (Unusual preparation, reveals character quirk)
Category #2: Hand/Body Part Specification
What it is: Specifying which hand, finger, foot, etc. performs action when it doesn’t matter.
Examples of over-explanation:
Excess detail: Nathan picked up the pitcher with his left hand and with his right hand he picked up a pen.
Default assumption: Nathan picked up the pitcher and a pen.
Why this works: Readers infer he used different hands. Which specific hand doesn’t matter.
Excess detail: She reached out with her right arm and extended her index finger.
Default assumption: She pointed.
Why this works: “Pointed” conveys all necessary information about the gesture.
Excess detail: Marcus stood on his left foot while scratching his right ankle with his right hand.
Default assumption: Marcus scratched his ankle.
Why this works: Physical logistics are obvious. Readers don’t need choreography guide.
When hand/body specificity matters:
Specify when it affects action or reveals character:
Sarah grabbed the knife with her left hand—the right was still bandaged. (Injury is plot-relevant)
The pianist’s right hand cramped. He continued with only his left. (Specific limitation affects performance)
She wrote with her left hand, smudging the ink across the page as she went. (Left-handedness causes specific problem)
Category #3: Mundane Action Micro-Description
What it is: Breaking simple actions into exhaustive component steps.
Examples of over-explanation:
Excess detail: Nathan lifted his arm, extended it toward the doorbell, pressed his index finger against the button, and pushed down to activate the chime.
Default assumption: Nathan rang the doorbell.
Why this works: “Rang the doorbell” conveys complete action. The mechanics are standard.
Excess detail: She opened the refrigerator door by pulling the handle toward her, leaned down to examine the contents on the lower shelves, reached her hand in, grasped the milk carton, and removed it from the refrigerator.
Default assumption: She got milk from the refrigerator.
Why this works: All those steps are inherent in “got milk from refrigerator.”
Excess detail: Marcus wrapped his fingers around the pen, lifted it from the desk surface, positioned the tip against the paper, and moved his hand to form letters.
Default assumption: Marcus wrote.
Why this works: “Wrote” encompasses all those micro-actions.
When to micro-describe:
Include detail when mechanics are unusual or difficult:
Nathan’s arthritic fingers fumbled with the tiny buttons. It took three tries to press the doorbell. (Difficulty is character-revealing and plot-relevant)
She opened the stuck refrigerator door with both hands, bracing her foot against the counter for leverage. (Unusual difficulty, specific action matters)
Category #4: Social Pleasantries and Rituals
What it is: Scripting standard social interactions in full detail.
Examples of over-explanation:
Excess detail: “Hello, Marcus,” Sarah said. “Hi, Sarah, how are you?” Marcus replied. “I’m fine, thanks. How are you?” Sarah asked. “Good, good. And how’s your mother?” Marcus inquired. “She’s doing well, thank you for asking,” Sarah answered. “Great. So, about the merger…”
Default assumption: Sarah and Marcus exchanged greetings. “So, about the merger…” Sarah said.
Why this works: Readers assume standard pleasantries occurred. No need to script them.
Excess detail: Sarah walked through the door. She hung her coat on the hook. She removed her shoes and placed them on the mat. She walked to the kitchen. She washed her hands. She dried them on the towel. Then she started cooking.
Default assumption: Sarah came home and started cooking.
Why this works: All those intermediate steps are standard routine. Can be compressed or eliminated.
When to include pleasantries/routines:
Include when they reveal character or advance plot:
“Hello, Marcus.” Sarah’s voice was ice. Marcus flinched. Skipped the usual “how are you.” “About the merger—” (Coldness and omission reveal tension)
Sarah walked through the door and went straight to the kitchen without removing her muddy shoes or hanging up her coat. She had to cook before he got home. (Breaking routine reveals urgency/distress)
Category #5: Environmental Details That Are Obviously Present
What it is: Pointing out elements that would obviously exist in that environment.
Examples of over-explanation:
Excess detail: Sarah entered the kitchen. There was a stove for cooking food. There was a refrigerator for keeping things cold. There were cabinets for storing dishes. There was a sink with running water for washing.
Default assumption: Sarah entered the kitchen.
Why this works: Readers know kitchens have stoves, refrigerators, sinks. These are defaults.
Excess detail: Marcus sat at his office desk, which had a flat surface for working and drawers for storage.
Default assumption: Marcus sat at his desk.
Why this works: That’s what desks are. No need to define desk function.
When to describe environmental elements:
Describe when unusual, absent, or plot-relevant:
Sarah entered the kitchen. No stove—just a microwave and a hot plate. The refrigerator door hung open, empty. (Absence and poverty-indicating details matter)
Marcus’s desk was obsessively organized. Pens aligned by height. Papers in perfect stacks. Even the stapler positioned at exact right angle. (Specific organization reveals character)
The Precision Paradox
When Specific = Worse
The paradox: More specific detail doesn’t always create clearer mental images. Sometimes it constrains readers’ imagination unnecessarily.
Example:
Over-specific: The doorbell was positioned on the right side of the frame, approximately 4 feet and 3 inches from the ground, inside a brass plate measuring 3 inches by 2 inches, with a white button in the center that glowed faintly.
Reader reaction: That’s… a lot of information I don’t need and won’t remember.
Appropriately general: The doorbell was beside the door.
Reader reaction: Got it. Moves on.
The Relevant Detail Principle
Include details that:
- Reveal character
- Advance plot
- Create atmosphere
- Establish setting uniquely
- Matter to the action
Exclude details that:
- Describe standard defaults
- Provide unnecessary precision
- Explain obvious mechanics
- Script routine interactions
- Define common objects
The Word Count Impact
The Mathematics of Micro-Bloat
Scenario: Novel with over-explanation habit
Average excess per sentence: 3-5 words Sentences per page: ~25 Pages in manuscript: 400
Calculation:
- 3 excess words × 25 sentences = 75 words per page
- 75 words × 400 pages = 30,000 excess words
That’s the difference between:
- 95,000 words (marketable length) vs. 125,000 words (too long for debut)
- Tight pacing vs. readers feeling it “drags”
- Professional craft vs. amateur bloat
Real Manuscript Examples
Before editing (128,000 words): Excessive hand specification, exhaustive pleasantries, over-described defaults throughout
After eliminating defaults (97,000 words): Removed 31,000 words without cutting a single scene or losing meaningful detail
Result: Manuscript went from “too long, needs restructuring” to “tight, well-paced, ready.”
The Revision Framework for Default Elimination
Phase 1: The Object Description Audit
Process:
- Search for common objects: car, chair, door, table, etc.
- For each instance, check description
- Ask: “Am I describing standard features?”
- If yes, eliminate description or reduce to object name only
Example revision:
Before: Sarah sat in a wooden chair with a flat seat and backrest. After: Sarah sat.
Saved: 10 words
Phase 2: The Hand/Body Part Purge
Process:
- Search for: “left hand,” “right hand,” “left foot,” “right foot,” etc.
- For each instance, ask: “Does it matter which hand/foot?”
- If no, eliminate specification
Example revision:
Before: Marcus picked up the coffee cup with his right hand and the file with his left hand. After: Marcus picked up the coffee cup and the file.
Saved: 10 words
Phase 3: The Micro-Action Compression
Process:
- Find descriptions longer than one sentence for simple actions
- Ask: “Can I use one precise verb instead?”
- Replace multi-step description with single verb
Example revision:
Before: She stood up from her chair, walked across the room to the door, grasped the handle, turned it, pulled the door open, and walked through. After: She left.
Saved: 24 words
Phase 4: The Pleasantries Elimination
Process:
- Find scripted greetings, small talk, routine interactions
- Ask: “Does this advance plot or reveal character?”
- If no, compress or eliminate
Example revision:
Before: “Hi, how are you?” “Good, you?” “Great, thanks.” [5 more lines of small talk] “So about that thing…”
After: After the usual greetings, Marcus got to the point. “About that thing…”
Saved: 30+ words
Phase 5: The Environmental Default Check
Process:
- Find room/setting descriptions
- Identify elements that are standard for that setting
- Eliminate descriptions of defaults
- Keep only unusual or plot-relevant details
Example revision:
Before: The conference room had a long table with chairs around it for people to sit in. There was a window that let in light. The walls were painted a neutral color.
After: The conference room’s window overlooked the parking lot.
Saved: 29 words (kept only detail that might matter)
When to Keep Detail: The Selective Specificity Guide
The Three Reasons to Describe
Reason #1: It Deviates from Default
Standard = skip Unusual = describe
Examples:
Skip (default): round black tires Describe (non-default): neon pink square tires
Skip (default): pointed Describe (non-default): pointed with his big toe while standing on his head
Reason #2: It Reveals Character
Generic detail = skip Character-revealing detail = describe
Examples:
Skip (generic): He drove a car Describe (character-revealing): He drove a meticulously maintained 1967 Mustang he’d restored himself
Skip (generic): She sat at her desk Describe (character-revealing): She sat at her obsessively organized desk, pens aligned by color
Reason #3: It Will Matter to Plot
Irrelevant = skip Plot-relevant = describe
Examples:
Skip (irrelevant): The hammer had a wooden handle Describe (will matter): The hammer’s rubber grip was slick with blood
Skip (irrelevant): He used his right hand Describe (will matter): He used his left hand—the right was in a cast
The Exception: Stylistic Maximalism
When Exhaustive Detail Is Intentional
Some writers intentionally embrace exhaustive detail as style.
Examples:
- Tom Wolfe’s detailed social observation
- Some literary fiction emphasizing material world
- Certain experimental approaches
Requirements for success:
- Must be intentional and consistent Not accidental bloat, but deliberate style maintained throughout
- Must serve artistic purpose Detail creates specific effect (satire, social commentary, sensory immersion)
- Must be executed skillfully Readable despite detail, not tedious
For most commercial fiction: This approach is too risky. Better to err toward concision.
Common Objections and Responses
Objection #1: “But I want readers to see exactly what I see!”
Response: They will—through selective detail that matters. Exhaustive detail actually prevents clear visualization by overwhelming readers with information they can’t process or retain.
Objection #2: “Won’t my writing feel sparse or generic?”
Response: Eliminating defaults leaves room to emphasize unique details that create distinctive atmosphere. Generic is describing standard features everyone assumes anyway.
Objection #3: “What about literary fiction that lingers on detail?”
Response: Literary detail should be purposeful—creating mood, revealing character, building theme. Not defining what chairs are or explaining how pointing works.
Objection #4: “I need to reach my word count goal.”
Response: Artificial inflation through unnecessary detail is immediately obvious to agents/editors. Better to write tight and develop plot/character if you need more words.
Objection #5: “Isn’t this telling instead of showing?”
Response: “Show don’t tell” means be specific about things that matter, not describe every mundane default. “Pointed” is showing. “Extended his index finger toward the object” is over-explaining a simple gesture.
Genre-Specific Considerations
Literary Fiction
Can include more detail for stylistic purposes But: Detail should serve artistic function, not just describe defaults
Thriller/Mystery
Prioritize pace over description Eliminate: Exhaustive pleasantries, routine descriptions Keep: Details that create suspense or reveal clues
Romance
Can linger on sensory details of attraction Eliminate: Generic object descriptions Keep: Specific details that create intimacy or sexual tension
Fantasy/Science Fiction
World-building requires more description Eliminate: Earth-default objects described exhaustively Keep: Unfamiliar elements that need explanation
Young Adult
Favor brevity and pace Eliminate: Over-explanation of anything teens already understand Keep: Details that create authentic teen experience
Your Action Plan: Cutting Default Bloat
Week 1: Object Audit
- Search common objects (car, chair, door, table, etc.)
- Eliminate descriptions of standard features
- Goal: Remove 2,000-4,000 words
Week 2: Hand/Body Specification
- Search “left/right hand/foot”
- Remove specification where it doesn’t matter
- Goal: Remove 1,000-2,000 words
Week 3: Micro-Action Compression
- Find multi-sentence descriptions of simple actions
- Replace with precise single verbs
- Goal: Remove 3,000-5,000 words
Week 4: Pleasantries & Routines
- Find scripted greetings, small talk
- Compress or eliminate where they don’t advance story
- Goal: Remove 2,000-4,000 words
Total expected reduction: 8,000-15,000 words
Final Thoughts: Trust Your Readers
The hardest lesson for many writers: Readers are smart. They can infer standard defaults.
You don’t need to define what chairs are, explain how pointing works, or script every “hello” and “how are you.”
When you describe that a car has round black tires, you’re not creating clarity—you’re insulting readers’ intelligence and wasting their time with information they already possess.
When you break simple actions into exhaustive component steps, you’re not being thorough—you’re bogging down pacing with unnecessary detail.
When you specify that a character used their right hand when it doesn’t matter which hand, you’re not being precise—you’re adding clutter that readers must process and immediately forget.
Trust readers to:
- Know what standard objects look like
- Infer routine actions
- Understand common gestures
- Assume default features
Focus your description on:
- Details that deviate from defaults
- Specifics that reveal character
- Elements that advance plot
- Atmosphere-creating particulars
Cut the defaults. Save thousands of words. Achieve the tight, professional pacing that agents and readers crave.
Review your manuscript: How many times do you describe standard features of common objects? How often do you specify which hand does something when it doesn’t matter? Start there—eliminate defaults and watch your word count drop 10,000+ words without losing anything meaningful.
FAQ: Default Objects and Gestures
Q: How do I know if a detail is a default or worth including? A: Ask: “Would readers assume this anyway?” If yes, it’s a default. Only include if it deviates from standard or serves specific purpose.
Q: What about world-building in fantasy/sci-fi? Don’t I need to describe objects? A: Describe objects that don’t exist in our world. But if your fantasy world has chairs that function like Earth chairs, you don’t need to explain chair mechanics.
Q: Can I ever specify which hand a character uses? A: Yes, when it matters: character is left-handed and this affects action, character has injury limiting hand use, specific hand matters to plot.
Q: Won’t cutting all this detail make my writing feel sparse? A: No—it makes it feel tight and professional. You’ll have more room for meaningful details that create distinctive atmosphere.
Q: What if my style is intentionally detailed and maximalist? A: Then it should be consistent and serve artistic purpose. But even maximalist writers should eliminate pointless defaults that don’t contribute to their aesthetic.
Q: How much can I realistically cut? A: Most manuscripts with default-bloat can cut 8,000-20,000 words without losing meaningful content.
